February 2, 29013:
I was sent the following summary from the ever-trustworthy gossip site perezhilton.com:
“Here is one hot mess. Kim Kardashian and her husband of 72 days. He wants an annulment. She says no because it is bad for the reality show to make it look like her marriage was a fraud. Here is what the gossip magazines are saying:
“Nothing like throwing your teammates under the bus to try and get back at your ex-wife who has clearly moved on, right?!
“After a year and a half of maintaining that he deserves an annulment for his marriage to Kim Kardashian, on the grounds of fraud, Kris Humphries will square off against his soon-to-be-ex-wife in a courtroom on May 6th.
“And although we’ve already seen his lawyer quit and claim there’s no legal grounds for the annulment and his parents BEG him to just settle and move on with his life, the Brooklyn Nets player is reportedly so hell-bent on vengeance that he’s ignored everyone around him…and now, may be willing to skip out on his own team if they make it to the 2013 NBA Playoffs and the games conflict with the upcoming trial!
“As most basketball fans know, the Nets could very well secure a spot in the Playoffs this year, which goes from April 20th – June 20th, and if the trial spans the course of multiple days and there IS a scheduling conflict, sources close to him have revealed his mind is made up, and he will ditch his commitment to the game(s)!”
Wow! How do you negotiate the settlement of a case like this?
Obviously, it won’t be easy, but it’s not impossible either. How you approach any negotiation of this nature depends, of course, on who you represent. If you represent Kardashian (remembering that the father was one of OJ’s criminal defense lawyers), your client’s fundamental interest is probably conflicting. On the one hand, having the lawsuit in the news is good for business. On the other hand, if the court grants an annulment based on fraud, the ruling could hurt the brand. Everyone likes the fictional Kardashian brand; no one wants her face slammed into the fact that the brand is a house of cards.
So you need a settlement that will maximize positive PR and minimize the risk of fraud.
If you represent Humprhies, you probably have a very angry, hurt, embarrassed client. After all, the Montecito wedding made a spectacular media splash. The fast relationship collapse made the whole thing look pretty cheesy. At best, Humphries was made out to be a world-wide laughingstock. Not good for a NBA star who is highly competitive, ambitious, and driven to be the best. He wants his honor and reputation restored. Unfortunately, a judgment of annulment will not do that for him. Yes, he can proclaim that the whole thing was a fraud if he wins, but will that really restore his reputation? Probably not. There will be a quick media frenzy until the next crazy thing catches fire, about 24 hours later. Humphries will still be remembered as the chump who married Kardashian. Of course, the more likely result is that he will lose because fraud of the type he is claiming is very difficult to prove.
The key to negotiation is helping Kris understand what his real interest, needs, goals, and desires are. If it really is reputation, then what are ways that he could come out of this head held high and with great dignity. You have to plant the seeds carefully because he is probably in vengeance mode. We know that when brains get into that state, the prefrontal cortex pretty much shuts down and rational decision-making goes out the window. Your job is to see if you can squeeze in some alternative scenarios that create more pleasure than the anticipation of thumping Kim Kardashian and her empire in court.
Does Kris have a philanthropic bent? Many NBA players do. What really sets his heart on fire around helping others? If he could change anything in the world, what would it be? Get him thinking big picture and smiling at how he would feel if he could some real good. Then start thinking about how to make that dream become a reality. That’s what the negotiation will be about–making Kris’s dream become a reality. You will give Kris a chance of compare the pleasure of making something good or even great out of tawdriness to the dark pleasure of anticipating the infliction of pain on Kim through a court judgment. Usually, the good wins over the bad. With a skilled mediator to assist, a reasonable outcome can be achieved.
Did I say it would be easy? Nope. And, having never met any of the principals, I could be off by a million miles. However, something like this will make what seems intractable resolvable.
UPDATE:
The media reported on April 19, 2013 that Humphries and Kardashian reached a settlement. This report followed the previous week’s report that Humphries failed to appear at a court-mandated settlement conference. That is never a good thing. I suspect that error in judgment allowed Humphries’ counsel and the court to apply pressure to Humphries to get this matter resolved. The terms of the settlement are confidential. However, Kardashian appeared in court to approve it so an annulment was probably not in the deal. This case demonstrates the maxim that every conflict comes to an end; it’s just about the timing.